PASTA

Archive for the ‘Local’ Category

In the Wee Small Hours of the Morning

In College, Local, Photography on October 12, 2010 at 6:52 pm

I don’t know what strange gene is responsible for my irresistible urge to shoot bizarre photography. Some might call it ADD.

The other night, I decided to go on a little field trip. My initial goal was to take pictures of hobos, however, to my extreme disdain, I couldn’t find any.

San Diego’s Ocean Beach must have a large nocturnally migratory homeless population. This is the only explanation I can attribute to the lack of usual street urchins that slump themselves into parking lot corners of OB and resemble sand bags.

But, not to worry, homeless people are not the only ones who wander the streets late at night in populated cities. If you were under this impression than you certainly forgot about the wine-o’s, Rastafarians, club hoppers, bizarre middle-aged couples who look like they regularly share cocaine, tatted up dudes with a contempt for authority, and your standard “ball twirler” guys who all wander the streets.

It took hard work to change these peoples skepticism of my photography. One alcohol-saturated individual- who’s portrait would have been the absolute gem of my pilgrimage, gracefully declined (“get that f***ing camera away from me before I kill you”) my attempts at capturing his essence through the lens. Despite the absence of this charming mans contribution to the album, I hope you enjoy the fruits of my labor.

Christian is an interesting fellow.

When I expressed interest in his tattoos, he was quick to bust out this bad boy. On his calf is the name of his son. I always said contrast was good for a person…

Contrast?

Typical.

I was hesitant to let him ride my bike at first.

Most likely a crack head.

Graffiti.

Advertisements

Hepatitis A

In Local on August 18, 2010 at 12:31 am

This is the pool at my tennis club south end. Looks nice right? Wrong.

Two days ago I was lounging in the sun, ordering a sandwich and sipping on Perrier.

While reading a book, I got hot from the sun and decided to go for a dip.

After swimming for a few minutes, I toweled myself off, and once again became submersed in my novel.

Pretty soon I noticed that the pool was being evacuated.

Fearing the worst, I asked the lifeguard why.

“Well, there is something in the pool, and we don’t really know what it is…”

“Something” must have been code for “piece of shit,” because that was precisely what was lurking at the bottom of the deep end.

At first we all thought it was a nut.

It could have innocently fallen off one of the trees you see pictured, and sunk to the pools depths.

Alas, it was not.

This was confirmed when Jorge, the pool net extraordinaire, fished the little nugget out of the infested water. Yep, it was a chunk of human feces, ripe with all kind of disease that no amount of chlorination could ever keep a body safe from.

I hate my tennis club now, and I hate the people who run it.

You may wonder why, since this whole situation was not their fault.

Well, most clubs faced by this dilemma would spend the time and money draining their pool, thus assuring the safety and well being of their guests.

However I guess the financial obligations of draining the pool precede the safety and well being of the guests, because it was back in action the next day.

Oh yeah, lets let people swim in a pool that contained a piece of human fecal matter without telling them.

This makes me wonder, how many other one-day-after-poo-in-in-the-pool-days have I gone swimming at my club?

Thanks guys, I’m really looking forward to some Hepatitis A.

Maurice

In Local, Photography on August 1, 2010 at 5:17 am

 

He fixes my surfboards.

Call him at 310 615-1008 or 310 702-0040 if you need a board fixed and you live in LA.

2nd Times a Charm

In Local, Photography on July 5, 2010 at 4:54 pm

My sister is an animal fanatic, so naturally she would be the one to capture an injured hawk and keep it as a house pet. The first time this bird showed up at the house, it was dismissed as a freakish occurrence, however, once it showed up again we knew it was injured.

From this picture you can CLEARLY see that it is a bird of prey and that if it had the chance, it would bite through your finger like a damn toothpick. It currently resides in … my bathroom, and is fed a steady diet of dead mice that are choked to death in my sink.